This week I have 2 papers, a test and a presentation, also there is another paper and a midterm i have not finished yet and BOTH are late. WTF? What is my problem, other than being a lazy slothlike sockful of poo? WTF exactly. That WTF, in expanded form What The Fuck, is really useful. That abbreviation resides in the margins of any of my textbooks that include racist, sexist, any-ist or just befuddling passages. Thanks, Dave, your legacy "really lives on" in a "useful way."

I haven't gotten a letter of acceptance yet for Chile. I worry about not graduating on time, because our school is lame-o and poor i guess, so is only offering this one class i need to graduate in the spring when i will be gone, and i don't know if they have the equivalent...hmmm........what to do? i have no fucking clue.

want to hear something stupid that i am worried about? i am worried about being fat and traveling to another country and being fat in said country's borders. God, could i live out a stereotype or what? I am going to the land of everyone being thin and eating pork all the time, and eating guinea pigs. i guess if you ate guinea pigs you'd probably not be stuffing your face all the time anyway.

I went contra dancing on thursday with this girl from my work, we had a blast. I LOve THat stuff, whirling around and wearing a big old swishy skirt and shouting "whee-haw!" and dancing with impossibly tall men and your eye gaze only reaches up to nipple level on their sweaty t-shirts....talk about a crazy time. I am ALWAYS shy about asking folks to dance, but love to dance, but everyone was really polite, etc. Actually I knew quite a few people, boys and girls, so we all danced. I just like that kind of dancing because it's flirty without being NAStay, like you're forced to look into so many pairs of eyes and it's intimate yet fast-moving. And you don't have to dance with the same person so it's not intense. And it's cool cause there were so many handsome fellas my age. Actually, this boy i have always had a thing for was there....i didn't partner with him but we whirled around a couple of times in all the confusion and changing. He's apparently one of those "dancer guys," though, because he was spinning and twirling around with all these extraneous moves. I would not be able to keep up. I never figured, either, i always just thought he was a literature student.....sigh.

This other boy I have a thing for, the one in my humanities class, i saw today driving an SUV. Like, an enormous shiny black one. So many boys give me butterflies right now that i need to rule some out, so i think his vehicle is as sufficient a reason as any. Plus Erin thinks he's gay. I don't believe it, but she insists. But really though, all these boys, it's absurd because I'm not going to talk to any of them or ask any of them out because i'm stupid, and this is like.....i think i'm reverting back to ninth grade. the wiccan/celtic phase, casting spells so boys would like me, will somebody please pelt me with candy corn so i can fix all these stupid situations? where are all the girls? why don't i have crushes on any girls right now? i would not put any live person through this kind of stupid contemplation ever. if brian were here he would tell me to ask someone out and get over it. brian is stupid and doesn't understand anything. sometimes i feel like he's turning into too much of an adult to have any fun with me, and sometimes he is so childish it drives me bonkers!

i watched harold and maude this weekend. alone. that movie is so awesome. so i felt free to laugh really loud while sitting in a leather chair.

i got the most badass package from summer last week! it was the sweetest letter i've ever gotten. she also sent this soap, which she hinted was made with aphrodesiac herbs. we'll see about that.

is it wrong that i lust over the instructor on my yoga video? i wears spandex briefs the whole time and has a HUGE package. as in, not BIKE SHORTS, but BRIEFS. i think i must be ovulating right now, i felt the pinch and the wanderlust.