so, me and j.ru went to new orleans, i hadn't been there since i was 15. we stayed with amazing sweet generous kind family friends, our "Egg parents". why? because they were parental and their house, besides the incredible metaphysical crystal collections, contained a disturbing egg-with-a-face-and-hands sculpture on a pedestal with its own track lighting that we invented an all-knowing slightly sinister personality for. the egg overshadowed our whole experience and follwed us allt eh way to georgia and forced us to get lost for 3 hours to escape its grasp and evade its obstacles. we hung out in cemetaries and pretended to be zombies, did ONE night on bourbon street. jru bought us a lap dance from a man who tried to make his black-man's-penis exotic, as if we hadn't ever seen one before. heh. heh heh. we bought daquiris that were larger than Big Gulps and split them. we were propositioned by gentlemen named Peanut, Uchungu adn Coochie at seperate junctures. we checked out the ripley's believe it or not (best one i've seen), munched on beignets at you-know-where, and watched a man channel an entity named lazaris from the land of lemuria which exists in another dimension (the same one as atlantis, which is why we cannot prove it existed) and sensually stroked crystals in order to release the wellsprings of gnome and salamander energy. we watched crystal videos and got our minds blown. i had a bunch of metaphysically confounding conversations with mr. tracy and felt like i got jest a little bit healed. saw my godparents and fortunately none of my relatives. managed to skip out on the ones we're still allowed to talk to, thank god. mr. tracy arranged for us to have a psychic reading done by his friend, who i was amazed gave us each at least an hour reading. she was REALLY right on about some stuff, while at first other stuff sounded like cheesy counseling session, pop psychology or childhood trauma hoky stuff but is now more clear. maybe. her card readings were pretty sharp, though, and razor sharp for julie's apparently. she said i was partially "psychically blocking" her and that i didn't want her to see what was in my head. hmmm. knew about dad, that his death was sudden, and she told me she was picking up an immense fear i had that something sudden and bad would happen to someone i was close to and i couldn't do anything to save them or anything about it. well duh, there's a little post-trauma. or so i thought...
hmmm....
so my mamá came to visit this weekend and told me that mr. tracy died on monday or tuesday, a day or 2 after we left. it was a total sudden surprise, and now it's so confusing. we talked about it and the possibility that i was meant to go there and see them before he left this place, or "left his meatsuit" as squirrelx so beautifully puts it. it was so healin outside of the julie-stress and being lost a bunch....like swampwater hitting my parched cypress roots and going back adn wetting years of dry spell. there're many more connections and confoundifications as well. tracy told us about how his 2 business partners, one of them being his best friend of 30 years or so had betrayed him, and once he found out he was so livid he was about to professionally obliterate them. then his psychic friend called (not like the 1-900 kind, they really were good friends in real life), the same one who did readings for us, cause she had a feeling, and told him she was getting images of him in a past life. he was like a warrior or a general in russia making a battle plan, and these 2 guys were his right hand men. instead of carrying out their plans they turbed on him, betrayed him adn he died, so she said it was an emotion so strong it carried over from that life into this one. so he made the choice of peacefully getting out while he still could and selling them the company. so my mamá tells me he emailed her on monday all upbeat and cheery and talking about our visit, and that that very day he was won his arbitration in court. then he dies. so, freaky coincidence? perhaps. in light of everything, i FEEL like maybe not. so tonight i pray for ms. sheila the wonderful strong smart person to hang in there and that there are LOTS of folks and kids who need her. i feel like there are a hundred more little details to that story as well that all fit together like a puzzle, or rather like a spider web or something silvery.
so now there is all this schoolwork and research to do and big huge breaths to take and prayers to utter and weights to lift and curtains to hang and dancing to do and bullshit to read and deities to invocate and pictures to develop and plants to water and beauty to cry about and poeple to miss and people to avoid and mamá's CARROT CAKE TO EAT!
we talked about the possibility of people dying once their souls have learned all they need to in this lifetime. julie disputes me heavily, and maybe we say that to make ourselves feel better in the wake of death, but i tend to lean toward the psychic's words. mom's doctor told her to go to this psychic in durham, like, for reals.
today i read squirrelx and she wrote "love trumps death". it was a different context but of course i feel like love trumps death in all contexts.
i love you guys and it's trumpin your death. hope you are chilling together in the afterlife. see you sooner that later.
lovetrumpsdeathlovetrupsdeathlovetrumpsdeath
peace out
